Women have more freedom....in ways, emotional that men wish they could express...not that were uncapable but.?

because as guys we have to secure out masuclinity, but in that we condem our selves





men walk a tight rope...too masculine=jerk...but if we open up...were=gay or feminine





men have emotions..but we learn that is un man like to express them...I'm not promoting hand holding..damn no...WE ARE MEN...





though





for example I like Shinade O' Connor "nothing compares to you"





but I would never let anyone know...b/c it would seem to soft





and regardless of your supporting girlfriends opinion for being sensitive an opening up ...men are never supposed to be the sensitve ones...only when it suits the moment





and we know this....we know this big time








so next time you think..."guys...so shallow and unsensitive...think of the conditioning and self questioning we have"





we can be gay and win your appraise but be ostisized and labled gay ( unattractive to women) if we expressed out deepest emotions....so we hide them..and some men to the extent of being hyper masculine?

Women have more freedom....in ways, emotional that men wish they could express...not that were uncapable but.?
Yes I think you are on to something with men being squeesed by social expectations of their roles and how they "should" act. I think women can be more flexible that way.





But personally I suggest that you be yourself and be how ever the hell you want to. Forget what other people's approval. What's more important their good opinion of you or your own freedom?





btw..I have to disagree with you on that one comment .. I Don't like boy bands and believe me I am soo Not eewww at the naked body male or female. Don't generalise like that if you please.
Reply:I think men need a kind of male liberation. I agree with what you are saying. Men and women aren't different, but because of female liberation if we want to be girly or a housewife, that's fine, or if we want to be a tomboy car mechanic that's fine too!





Men need this aswell, so that if they don't like sport that's ok! If they like romance films, that's ok too!





All the women I meet don't have a problem with men showing their feminine traits, it's the other men that are the problem.





Feminine and masculine traits are only what society has labelled. We are all individuals with different personality traits. This is how my husband and I live, and we are very happy.





There's the saying 'Why are all the great men gay?!' and I know this is kind of a light hearted thing, but I admire gay men or camp men because they are strong and confident enough to say 'this is who I am, yes I have some 'feminine' personality traits, this is me!!'








EDIT: I just read all your additional details and you've let yourself down. You are just being sexist about how women mess up and cause the resteraints. It's the other men that are causing the restraints. I agreed with you at first, but by your extra comments you obviously have an issue with women thinking we are the ones stopping you from showing emotions and we mess up more than men...you've let yourself down. You just seem like a sexist male chauvenist now.
Reply:You have a point (if oddly expressed). An open man seems to be only in films these days, he would be laughed at in reality. Who's to blame? I don't know.
Reply:I love that song too and I'm sorry you have it so tough.
Reply:blah blah blah women are superior blah blah blah.
Reply:who are you trying to convince you or us????You have major problems I guess...you must have been with the wrong women or girls....you better not start on women in here...that might be your worst mistake....
Reply:I think men who express their emotions are attractive. I don't want to be with a guy who bottles things up, because I know that if he does this, those emotions are going to come out in either a self-destructive way or in a way that's harmful to someone else. I find that men who are able to express their emotions are more emotionally and psychologically healthy and secure...and I find that to be a very good thing.
Reply:I don't like the idea of men crying. I know I've choked up at times in my life, but never over silly crap. The idea of men displaying emotion the way wome display it, well do what you want, but I'd view the guy as a pansy.





Also, some women say they want a man to cry, but they still lose respect for him when he does.





Look what crying did for Hillary!
Reply:I understand where you're coming from. And men are taught not to cry or show emotion. But you must realize that it wasn't women who did this to you guys. YOU meaning men, did it to yourselves. A woman can sympathize with a man that breaks down or shows emotion, because we're emotional creatures by nature. I've even had close Friends who are men get choked up around me when talking about marriage, family, careers and emotional scares. And they didn't not want to show any motion when talking about it. But I had to remind them that they are human, and that it's ok to cry or let it out. You feel so much better when you get things off your chest verses bottling it up in side. But the masculinity issue is someting that man in general has cursed himself with. That's not our fault. You should try listening to Bishop T.D. Jake's "Hemotions" cd. It's really good. And I'm sure what ever you're going through right now, it will help you deal with.
Reply:You can say we have more freedom, but have you noticed the crap we take when we express these same emotions you're talking about?





Anyone, regardless of ethnicity, age, or gender, is going to take crap when they express REAL emotion. Listen, you have to do it anyway. If you've got the emotion, express it because if you don't, you're going to suffer internally. Better to suffer on the outside than on the inside, I always say.
Reply:I think it is fine when men are able to open up about their feelings. I don't expect my hubs or son to hold it all in and never speak a word of it. That's not fair. But it also seems like guys just naturally aren't as emotionally open as women are. Whether that is an inborn thing or a societal expectation, I have no idea. I think it is a bit of both. But I don't think that guys are insensitive or shallow for being all macho and tough. They are human, they can feel. Just as I wouldn't expect or force a man to hold it in all the time, neither would I expect or encourage him to let it all out and wear his heart on his sleeve if he's not comfortable doing so (I'm not comfortable doing that either....I am a private kind of gal).





I think it is fine when women open up about their feelings....but I get pretty annoyed by overly emotional women. You know, the ones who snivel and cry over every little slight and upset, the ones who make decisions based on "I feel" rather than "I think"....yeah. I don't like that either. Blech. It gets really old, really fast.





I think it is healthy when people, male or female, are comfortable with their emotions and aren't ashamed to shed tears when they have a good reason to be shed. But when people are obsessive about their feelings, or are led around by emotion rather than ration, that's not so healthy.
Reply:I don't think many women have any problem at all with men showing emotion. In fact I'd bet the majority of women raise higher concerns when men act as though they are emotionally dead. In short, I don't know where "society" got the idea that men should always be emotionally detached.





Showing emotion is healthy, and emotion in it's self does not denote any specific gender connotation. So it is a big shame that society views men showing emotion as being a bad thing.
Reply:It is perhaps true that men tend to be looked down upon for expressing certain emotions. Sadness is one of them. However, I believe this to be a context specific behavior. If a man cries at every little thing, then he will be viewed as weak. If a man cries at the death of his mother/father/sister/brother/etc. then this will not be the case anymore (I've seen this happen more than once and none of the men who did so were labeled "gay"). So I don't think it is always the case that men are somehow supposed to suppress their emotions rather that it depends upon the situation at hand. The idea that society wants men to be Stoic is a rather broad statement which doesn't get at the most important aspect of every situation: the context under which the behavior occurs. Besides there are, in some cases, times when one probably shouldn't express one's feelings. For example, when you hate your boss so much that you could literally commit homicide because of your anger. Expressing feelings in that situation are likely to land you in jail. Same goes, again, for when you receive a gift which you really didn't want and can't use for Christmas. Do you simply tell the person "what a waste of money" or do you accept it graciously upholding the ideal of "it's the thought that counts? One will keep the relationship going whereas the other will probably aid in the destruction of it. I believe that, in some ways men having better control over emoting is a good thing. A man won't explode (called catharsis in psychology) if he keeps it all in rather he may just come to terms with situations he can't change and by so doing live a longer and more mentally stable life.
Reply:I agree.


Men are socially conditioned to repress feelings, as not to appear weak and emotionally needy.


Its very unfortunate in that it creates a disconnect between the sexes.


Women complain that men are not emotional enough...and men complain that women talk to much and are too emotional.


I am forever trying to get men to drop the societal BS, open up and be free to express themselves...
Reply:I agree. It's very sad to see guys suppressing their true natures in an effort to abide by standards of masculinity. We should all just be honest with ourselves.
Reply:Men are more free to show anger and aggression than women are. If a man shows those emotions, he's being manly. However, if a woman shows those same emotions, she's often seen as being a ***** or a shrew.
Reply:because guys have higher pride!! and trust me.. it'll swallow you soon...

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